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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22505917">The One</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jadeylovesmarvel/pseuds/Jadeylovesmarvel'>Jadeylovesmarvel</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff, Moving On, Past Relationship(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 18:59:58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,497</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22505917</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jadeylovesmarvel/pseuds/Jadeylovesmarvel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Y/N is reflecting on your past relationship with Steve and all the unrequited feelings and angst that came with it. It was a hope that you held onto for years, a hope that he would finally feel the same way for you. That hope was crushed the minute he returned to the past to be with Peggy and yes while you were devastated it made you stronger, helped you learn to love yourself again after years of doubt and pain and ultimately leads you to the person who would become the true love of your life.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader, Steve Rogers/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>91</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Endings</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This story came to me while listening to Lose you to love me by Selena Gomez. I've never written anything with Steve/Reader before and while this will ultimately become a Bucky/Reader story, it will touch upon the reader's past relationship with Steve. I'm not sure how many chapters this will be? Maybe four or five? We will see. I originally planned to write a songfic and just one chapter but I wanted to expand on the story a little more. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this. 🙂</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>From the moment that I returned after the reversal of the snap, I knew something had changed. Call it a sixth sense if you will but the minute I looked into Steve's eyes I knew that he wasn't mine any more. If he ever really was mine, to begin with. </p>
<p>Mine and Steve's relationship was one-sided from the start. Honestly, if I thought about it realistically from the minute that I met him in 2015, just a young Shield agent, shy and eager to please I should have known then what was coming now. Still, you can't see into the future, can you?. I fell for Steve way back then very hard and very fast, it only grew over the years and as I watched him grow closer to Sharon Carter for a short while, naively I still had hope that one day he would finally notice me, want to be with me. </p>
<p>After the events of 2016 and the disbandment of the team, I found myself on the run with Sam, Steve and Wanda ( eventually joined by Nat ). Steve and I grew closer forming a bond, finding comfort in each other in the lonely days and nights that stretched in front of us. As my relationship with Steve progressed I also found a friend in Bucky getting to know him little by little through his Skype conversations with Steve as he was recovering from getting his trigger words removed after being put willingly in cryogenic sleep in Wakanda.</p>
<p>"Y/N?". Steve says softly pulling me out of my reverie and I look up at him as he gestures for me to sit beside him on the bed. His tone makes me nervous but I do sit curious about what he wants to say. </p>
<p>"Steve, what's wrong?". He takes a deep breath and gently places his hand on mines. The anxiety of what he's about to say builds inside me and I begin to grow impatient as he struggles to find the words on what he's about to tell me. </p>
<p>"Look, honey, you know that I care about you right?". Confused I nod and excited thoughts begin to race through my mind. Perhaps I'm being silly?, I've been gone for five years due to the snap, it's natural it will take Steve and me some time to settle back into our relationship. I smile and squeeze his hand back.</p>
<p>"Of course I do Stevie, I'm so happy to be back. Hey, maybe we could do something? After Tony's funeral, our farewell to Nat. Just the two of us?". He swallows and looks at me there are tears in his eyes. "Steve?" <br/>Finally, he is prompted to speak. </p>
<p>"Y/N, Sweetheart I won't be here after the funeral or Nats farewell". I frown confused heart beginning to pound in my chest before I can speak he cups my cheek and clarifies what he means. "Clint told you how we brought you all back right?". I nod and he sighs. "I'm going to return the infinity stones to their correct place in time and after I... I'm going to find Peggy, I'm going back to her, I can't miss this chance Y/N".</p>
<p>I stare at him as his words sink in, aware of the feeling of my heart completely breaking. He's going to return to her, after all of this time it's always been her. Deep down inside I've always known it's just I've always hoped that he could feel for me what he felt for her but she's his lost love, his true love in his eyes, of course, I would never compare. A hundred different emotions flow through me. Anger, sadness and a feeling of loss that's so excruciating. </p>
<p>The tears begin to fall before I can stop them, I will myself to be strong to compose myself but nothing works and I get up hastily not wanting him to see me cry. </p>
<p>" Honey?". I whip around the anger fully burning in my veins now. Steve branches and I let out all of the frustration inside me. </p>
<p>"Honey? Don't honey me Steve Rogers, what was I to you huh?. Just someone to warm your bed, boost your ego? For years all I've ever done is tried to make you happy because I adore you and I was thrilled when you appeared to feel the same but it was never like that for you was it? All you wanted was someone for lonely nights. I cared about you so much Steve and I... Its always been her, hasn't it? I never stood a chance?".He stays silent and I groan. "Just tell me the truth, Steve. I deserve that, you made me believe you cared about me as much as I do about you so please tell me the truth?".</p>
<p>There's a moment of silence before he replies in a soothing tone, regret in his voice.<br/>"I'm sorry sweetheart, I truly am but you're right it's always been, Peggy. You're my friend and I care about you, but you were a comfort to me. I should have never got your hopes up I'm so sorry." I turn away from him, the pain is just too much, it feels like I can't breathe. I'm such an idiot. Broken, I head for the door and he stops me, his hand on my arm trying to soothe my anguish. "Y/N, wait!". I shrug it away.</p>
<p>"No Steve there's nothing you can say that can fix this, I understand alright, I do but what do you want me to say? That I'm happy for you? Maybe I will be in time but right now I just need to go.". He releases me and I head out hurrying past Bucky, Sam and Wanda desperate to make sense of this all. Just needing time alone.</p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x </p>
<p>After the funeral and Nats farewell, it's time for Steve to return the stones. I don't want to watch this but I have to be there for Bucky and Sam. Do they know what he's about to do?. I watch him say goodbye to Bucky and from their conversation I realise Bucky does indeed know what Steve is doing. Steve then turns to me and he smiles sadly.</p>
<p>"I'm truly sorry honey, I hope you can find your true love one day. All I want is for you to be happy.". He sounds so sincere, so sweet. I smile back wistful, knowing that I can't be selfish and taking small comfort in knowing he will be truly happy with Peggy but it still doesn't stop the hurt. </p>
<p>"That's all I want for you too." He gently kisses my cheek nods to Bucky, Bruce and Sam then after a few seconds he's gone. I feel a gentle pressure on my fingers realising Bucky has gently threaded his metal hand through mine, I squeeze his hand gratefully as we take comfort in each other. God, he will feel as lost as I do now. More so, considering Steve is his best friend. After five seconds there's a brief commotion when Steve doesn't appear back when he's supposed too but before I can worry, I see a figure in the distance sitting on the bench.</p>
<p>He's older, wrinkles and grey hair but its Steve. Approaching from a distance I watch as he speaks with Sam. There's a flash of something, gold glittering in the sunlight and I see the ring, the gold band on his finger and the crushing ache doubles. Numb I head back to Bucky and whatever he sees on my face causes him to lead me away from the scene and in quiet solitude, he pulls me against his chest as the grief takes over and I sob out all of the hurt.</p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x </p>
<p>As Bucky and I sit gazing out at the lake he turns to me, it's late and slightly freezing now. His jacket is perched around my shoulders, a sweet gesture when he saw me shiver from the chill in the air. </p>
<p>"What's your plans now doll?". I bite my lip unsure and ask him instead.<br/>"I have no idea, honestly. Maybe travel for a bit but then I want to come back to New York. You?". He grins and it's so infectious that I find myself smiling back.</p>
<p>"Oh you know bird brain and I will be around New York," he softens. "I think Sam and I need each other right now, no matter how much we drive each other mad. He's a good guy and Whenever you want to come back from travelling you always have a place to stay with us." Grateful I squeeze his hand and for the first time in days, I feel hope.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Xxxx xxxxx xxxx xxxxx xxxx xxx xxxx xxxx xxx xxxx xx</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. New beginnings</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Its time for Y/N to come home to New York.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey :) Thank you to everyone who left kudos, etc for Chapter one. Now I'm thinking for this story that I may include Sharon at some point but in a relatively minor role and more as a good and supportive friend for the reader. I'm still not sure how long I want this story to be but I will see how it goes. Also, this will be more of a fluffy story with some angst but mainly just exploring the process of moving on and finding happiness again.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Its been two months since I left New York and slowly but surely my shattered heart has started to heal. It's taken some time and a lot of patience but I feel like finally, I am getting to a place where I feel at peace with what happened. At first, it was hard as not only was I grieving the loss of Steve but I truly didn't realise how much I'd lost myself in the relationship, the pain of always hoping for something more and craving his affection and love. </p><p>It wasn't healthy and in some ways, I'm stunned that I let myself fall that far for someone who had no intention of ever letting me into his heart permanently, I guess I went into the relationship with Steve blindly, as I had only one other relationship before him and I was still navigating how to be in one and learning about what I wanted.</p><p>In all honesty, I think I viewed Steve and mines relationship with rose coloured glasses in the entirety of our time being together, I truly believed we were on the same page and falling for each other deeply, when in reality I was just a comfort to him. I truly wish that I had opened my eyes and saw what no doubt the others saw when watching us together. It's the sting of unrequited love that's been the hardest to get over and the knock-on my confidence and self-esteem that came with it, on that part especially the confidence and self-esteem part I'm still healing. </p><p>On a lighter note, I do feel a sense of freedom that I guess is to do with being so stuck on the idea of something for years and then finally letting go of it. It's a cathartic experience. </p><p>Today is also special because finally, I am home in New York and currently outside Bucky and Sams apartment. We have been in close contact, Bucky and I especially since I left and I've found myself craving to be rooted somewhere with my friends and get back to some normality. After a moment of hesitation, I knock on the door and hear Buckys voice which makes me feel so happy.</p><p>"Pigeon, get the door." I stifle a smile as Sam answers back, and the back and forth argument that ensues makes me giggle, God, I've missed these two so much.</p><p>I hear Bucky's grumbling tones as he reaches the door and it swings open, we come face to face and a large beaming smile takes over his previously grumpy expression and he gathers me up in a massive hug that makes me feel truly that I'm home and that I belong here.</p><p>"Y/N, doll I'm so glad that you're back". Its good to be back, I pull away from him a fraction and gape a little fully taking in his appearance.<br/>
"Buck you cut your hair!". His cheeks turn pink and he nods softly running his hand through the new short style, he looks really, really good. Content and happy, I'm so pleased. </p><p>"Yeah, I needed a change doll, it was such a freeing moment you know?", understanding completely I nod and he guides me to the sofa as I take in the apartment it's gorgeous and so cosy and comfy, its minimally decorated but the atmosphere just feels relaxed and peaceful. Sam comes out from the kitchen breaking my thoughts and grins pulling me into a tight embrace.<br/>
"Hey, honey its good to have you back."<br/>
"It's good to be back, so tell me what have you two been up to?" I'm eager to hear how they have been doing, I've heard little bits when we have contacted each other but it's not the same as a full-blown sit-down catch up and we all settle down to start talking.</p><p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x </p><p>It's a few hours later and I'm fully caught up on the goings-on around here as the three of us share a few beers and takeout food. Sam has told me about the struggle he had to keep the shield and mantel that Steve gave him to carry on the legacy of Captain America and I'm utterly disgusted at the reaction of some of the government here, all because Sam doesn't fit their vision of the perfect Captain. It really does make my blood boil and call the officials who tried to remove him of the shield, names that make Bucky nearly choke on his food. Thankfully that has somewhat calmed down now when Steve himself stepped in and helped Sam but the whole ordeal still makes me furious. I know pretty much what Bucky has been up to but can't help teasing him a little about the couple of dates he's been on. I'm so glad he is fully putting himself out there and moving on from his past, he deserves it so much.</p><p>He shrugs as we chat about the dates and hands me more beer.<br/>
"The dates were nice doll but I don't know, I want to be with the right person and not just date for the sake of dating. I am glad it's something I have tried but I want to wait for the right woman... So how are you really dealing with the whole Steve thing?". Sam looks up watching me closely and I contemplate my answer. </p><p>"Better, honestly I think the time away helped, I really needed it and in a lot of ways I have healed. I should have known that it would always be Peggy, deep down I think I did know it was just admitting it.". I pause before continuing to speak collecting my thoughts, "For so long I was consumed by the thought of Steve and me, it wasn't healthy and certainly isn't what I want from a relationship, not something that's so draining emotionally and damages my self-esteem. Really I think this happening is a good thing, I'd lost so much confidence which I hate. I wish I'd been stronger to just walk away from him on my own but I can't change the past, I can only learn from it and grow. I am glad Steve was able to have his happy ending and I would really like to find mine one day."</p><p>"Hear, hear". Sam grins and then looks briefly at Bucky, who turns to me and says kindly.<br/>
"The offer of living with us still stands Y/N, you always have a place here." Touched at his sweetness I kiss his cheek softly and gather the dishes a warm feeling settles in my stomach when I look at him.<br/>
"Thank you, I would really like that Buck". Sam grins and yells out.<br/>
"Aww shucks, group hug everyone". I shriek with laughter as he pulls Bucky and me into a big hug and I smile I really do feel at home now.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Please do not copy or share my work anywhere else without my permission. Thanks :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bucky and the reader begin to grow closer...</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is just a short and sweet chapter, between the Reader and Bucky. Pure fluff and a little hint of the romance that's to come. Thanks to all who left kudos, etc. It does mean a lot :) I've been having a stressful time lately so it's nice to have an outlet through my stories. Once again please do not copy or post my work anywhere else without my permission.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>For the first couple of weeks, living with the guys is something that takes a little bit of time getting used too. I love to watch the friendship between Bucky and Sam and while they argue and tease each other mercilessly, there is a deep bond between them that is so strong and just lovely to watch. The friendships I have with them, however, are vastly different.</p>
<p>Sam and I have more of a teasing relationship, sibling-like in a way and we spend most of the days together filled with fun and laughter. Bucky, on the other hand, is quieter than Sam but I feel more connected with him on an emotional level. Maybe it's because of all the talks we had while he was in Wakanda but I feel like I can talk to him about anything. We've forged a bond that I can't explain logically, it just feels right. It isn't unusual for Sam to find us curled up together on the couch watching a new movie craze that Bucky gets hooked on or me simply introducing him to a classic that he is fascinated by.</p>
<p>On one particular night while we indulge in some movie classics Bucky turns to me and says gently. <br/>"Hey, doll how are you liking living with Sam and me?." I think about this for a moment and answer truthfully. <br/>"I love it here honestly, you and Sam have been so helpful, I do love these movie nights, it's nice to be surrounded by friends, kinda helps the healing process". I pause. "I think, that I'm moving on slowly but surely. I want to meet someone nice you know? It's just building my confidence back up and getting out there again, my confidence had been knocked quite badly. It's made me question myself when I know I  shouldn't but it's just telling myself that it wasn't my fault or Steves. If I'm being honest we just weren't meant for each other." </p>
<p>He pauses for a brief second and softens taking my hand, squeezing it gently.<br/>"Doll, you're amazing and beautiful, so sweet. Fuck, I don't know what Steve was thinking. If you were mine I'd never let you go." His words wash over me and I feel butterflies dance in my stomach. He's so sweet, that warm feeling blooms in my chest again and I can't explain why but when I look at him it feels like I'm home, I never felt that with Steve so it startles me for a moment before I recover quickly.</p>
<p>"You're sweet Buck, thank you. You're such an amazing man, you've been so kind to me and you didn't have to be." He smiles and pulls me into a hug, I melt into it and rest my head against his chest. I feel his heartbeat quicken and peer up at him. "Your hearts beating pretty fast, are you alright, Buck?". His eyes meet mine and I feel my stomach flip at the intensity of his gaze.</p>
<p>" Perfect doll, I'm just happy that's all." I smile at his response because right now that's exactly how I'm feeling too.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. You've got a friend in me.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bucky and the reader begin to grow closer and Sharon is on hand to offer some very important advice and encouragement.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi everyone, Thanks so much for all of the kudos on the last chapter :). I'm really grateful to you all. Yes I did name this chapter after a song from Toy Story 😁 It fits with the theme of the chapter and I just think it's so cute. 💞☺ As always please do not copy or post my work anywhere else without my permission. ☺</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bucky's words play on my mind for the next few days. "If you were mine I'd never let you go". It still warms my heart and I feel even closer to Bucky because of it. As I settle into my bed for the night and begin to read a strange noise pulls me out of my little bubble. </p>
<p>Confused I get up and my heart sinks as I realise that the noise is coming from Buckys room. Sam says that Bucky still has nightmares from time to time and it pains me deeply as I desperately want to help him. I knock on his door and head inside finding him thrashing around on the bed, carefully I settle on his bed and call to him soothingly.</p>
<p>"Bucky?". He whimpers and I rub soothing circles on his back as his eyes slowly open focusing on me. He swallows and shakes his head embarrassed.<br/>"You shouldn't be here doll, I don't want you to see me like this". I soften and make myself comfy next to him, I don't want to leave him on his own... Not like this.<br/>"I'm not going anywhere Buck, especially after a nightmare like that".</p>
<p>He concedes and shudders a little before speaking again and I listen as he begins to tell me about the nightmares, the helplessness that he feels and guilt for having caused so much pain. I feel my heart ache as tears fall down his cheeks, he growls and wipes them away annoyed. Ever so gently I touch his cheek and his tense body relaxes.</p>
<p>"Now you listen to me Bucky Barnes, what happened wasn't your fault, you were taken against your will and moulded and tortured into being the Soldier. You had your mind-wiped and you were brainwashed by Hydra to do their bidding. It's them who are the evil party in this, not you". He manages a weak, small smile and I hold my arms open to him, he looks at them confused.</p>
<p>"Hydra taught you to only ever associate touch with pain right?". He affirms this nodding his head, "Well I'm going to change that, now come here handsome. I could really do with a hug myself".His cheeks turn pink and he looks so adorably flustered but settles in my arms and I begin to stroke his hair, his shallow breaths even out and it isn't long before he's asleep. I stay awake for a little while as I contemplate this new development and why I feel so much closer to Bucky than I ever did with Steve.</p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x </p>
<p>I wake up in the morning to beautiful, blue eyes gazing down at me and heat pools in my cheeks as I meet Buckys gaze.<br/>"Hi." I murmur shyly, he smiles and gets up looking so much more relaxed than he did last night.<br/>"Hey, beautiful, thank you for last night. You're a sweetheart and I'm so grateful you helped me out". I beam and lean over kissing his cheek. A funny tension fills the air when I do and I can't help but look longingly at his full, perfect pink lips. What would it feel like to lean over and press my lips against his?.</p>
<p>The ache grows stronger and stronger and I pull myself away. He's Steves best friend, what the hell am I doing?. God, what bucky must think of me?. I look away and give him a small smile.<br/>"Anytime Buck, I mean that. You don't have to go through this stuff alone". With that said I head back to my room trying to make sense of these feelings inside me.</p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x </p>
<p>Sharon is back in town today and Bucky, Sam and I meet her for lunch. She too is coming to terms with all that happened with Steve and I feel like a bond has formed between us because of that.</p>
<p>As the boys are distracted elsewhere the talk turns to romance and she tells me excitedly about a new relationship she's started with a guy called Aaron.<br/>"He's really nice you know? After the snap, everything felt so chaotic and overwhelming but I don't feel like that so much with him, everything feels brighter, happier because of him. It's a nice feeling". She looks at me for a moment a knowing glint in her eyes. "What about you honey? How are you dealing with the snap? Steve?". </p>
<p>I shrug and contemplate my answer, Right now I feel fine emotionally and physically and I know Bucky and Sam have been a big help in getting me to this point.<br/>"I'm doing really good, living with the guys its... It's what I needed, they are really great especially Bucky he...". That knowing glint returns to her gaze and I pause confused. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?". She grins and answers as if it's obvious.</p>
<p>"Oh come on, have you seen the way he looks at you? the way you look at him? That tension. He's got it bad honey and so do you". I bite my lip mulling over her words and she carries on, "Still I could be misreading things, you two are just best friends and very close. The thought of him with someone else doesn't bother you in the slightest and you certainly have never thought about kissing him." I stiffen stunned and she smirks knowing she's got me and that I can't dispute how I'm feeling.</p>
<p>"Fine, fine okay. I do have feelings for him, when I look at him it feels like I'm home and that comforting, warm feeling of just being with my person. It scares me, I never felt like this with Steve". I begin to panic. " What if you're wrong and he doesn't feel the same or meets someone else?. I can't be selfish, he deserves to be happy and...". She cuts me off and calms me down with soothing tones.</p>
<p>"Honey, you're all that man wants, it's like he sees no one else when you're around. He's crazy about you". I relax a little heart rate calming down and tell her my next concern.<br/>"He's Steves best friend". She gives me an exasperated look and sighs.</p>
<p>"What and you don't think Steve would want you to be happy? That he would want Bucky to be happy?, Knowing him he will most likely be thrilled". Bucky and Sam come back before I can say anything else and Bucky gives me a coy smile and hands me the prettiest bunch of flowers I've ever seen. Pink peonies and roses are nestled together with one bright and beautiful sunflower perched in the middle. Its an unusual combination but so utterly beautiful. </p>
<p>"The guy selling them outside told me to give them to the person that brings the most happiness and sunshine into my life. That's you doll." Bucky tells me as he sits beside me, ignoring Sams teasing. I melt at his words. He's honestly just the sweetest man.<br/>"Thank you, Buck, this made my day. You're so thoughtful". I take his hand in my mine hoping he doesn't mind, he stares at me gaze warm and tightens the hold. We stay like that all through lunch and I know in my heart that I am falling for him deeply. </p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx x x x x x x x x x x x</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Misunderstandings and Heart to Hearts</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Misunderstandings ensue and a heart to heart is all it takes to clear up all of the angst and confusion.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi everyone 🙂 Thank you for all the kudos etc on the last chapter :). This Chapter is slightly angsty but ends with a lot of fluff. I may do one or two more chapters but the story is pretty much wrapping up :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>While Sam is visiting Steve for the day, Bucky and I decide to head out to the park and enjoy the sunshine. I feel nervous around him after my realisation the other day that I am falling deeply for him. I do want to tell him but I'm scared of what he will say?. Yes Sharon is adamant that Bucky feels the same way I do but I can't risk telling him then he turns me down and my heart gets broken again from unrequited feelings.</p>
<p>Bucky himself is quiet as well and as we settle down on one of the benches and enjoy the stunning views he eventually speaks up sounding nervous which worries me.<br/>
"Hey, doll, have you ever thought about dating again?. I understand all of the stuff with Stevie might have put you off, but there are great guys out there. Guys who would treat you like a queen, who would never be stupid enough to let you go, who would love to be with you for the rest of their life". I blush and answer his question truthfully.</p>
<p>"Yes, I have thought about it. I want to find a nice guy Buck. The one for me, and honestly I just want to be happy". I bite my lip and ask him curiously, dreading the answer. "What about you Buck? so many beautiful women notice you, all the time. Do you want to date anyone?". His cheeks turn pink and he gets that anxious look in his eyes again before he hardens and a sort of determined look crosses his features.</p>
<p>"Yes I do, but only the right woman doll, she's the one I want to spend the rest of my life with". I pause confused by his choice of words and an uneasy pit forms in my stomach.<br/>

"You say that like you've already found her Buck?". He softens and nods which makes my heart drop. </p>
<p>"That's the thing doll, I have found her". At hearing these words, I scramble to put a smile on my face even though it feels like my heart is aching, it's agonizing but what can I do? He's one of my best friends and I want him to be happy. After all that he's been through, he deserves it so much. I can't tell him how I feel, not if he has this perfect woman that he wants, Sharon really must have been mistaken when she thought it was me... I mean he would have said, wouldn't he? </p>
<p>"That's great Buck, really I'm so pleased for you". I will myself to sound happy and not like how I'm really feeling inside. I can't be selfish about this, he is happy and that's all that matters.</p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x</p>
<p>It's late at night and I can't sleep, a million and one thoughts are racing around my mind and I can't shut them off. Frustrated I get up and decide to make some of the sleep tea that Sam bought for us all the other day. Tiptoeing quietly out of my room I head into the kitchen, turn the light on then let out a shriek as I find Bucky sitting at the kitchen table lost in thought. </p>
<p>"Damn Bucky you scared me." I try to calm my racing heart and head over to make some tea. "Are you okay?" I ask him concerned as he's so quiet and as I look at him fully, I notice he looks upset. He frowns and then says to me hurt in his tone.</p>
<p>"Why have you been avoiding me? Have I done something wrong?". I gape and recover quickly, I've not been avoiding him, have I?. Guilt squirms in my stomach and I mentally kick myself at his pouty look and hurry to fix this mess.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry Buck, I didn't mean to and no you have done nothing wrong, this is all on me, I'm such a shitty friend I'm so sorry". I feel the tears come before I can stop them and I sag. No wonder he doesn't want me, he's so kind and sweet and I've just been a bad friend moping around because he doesn't feel the same way about me as I do about him. His eyes widen and he cups my cheek.<br/>
"No, please don't cry sweetheart". I cuddle into his open arms and nuzzle into his chest, all the emotions I'm feeling pour out before I can stop them.</p>
<p>"I'm so sorry Buck, I've been so selfish and I'm sorry. You deserve to be happy and I'm so happy you've found that perfect woman you want, I just". I panic and shut up quickly. He stills and his hand that is gently rubbing my back stops, he looks down at me and there is a flicker of something in his eyes that makes my stomach flip.</p>
<p>"Just what?". He asks softly and I clam up. "Don't be shy now doll, tell me what you were going to say".<br/>
Nerves fill my stomach and I meet his gaze, deciding to just go for it, at least it will be out there and I can move on from this when he inevitably turns me down.<br/>
"I just wish it was me, I've fallen for you Buck, I'm falling in love with you and I know you don't feel the same way. It's okay, you have that perfect girl and I". He grins, eyes twinkling and he walks over to me stopping my anxious speech </p>
<p>"You know you're oblivious doll". I blink startled at his choice of words but feel a small bubble of hope beginning to form in my chest. "I've been trying to figure out how to tell you for days, ever since our conversation at the park when you said you were ready to date again but then you were distant and I couldn't find the right moment. Fuck, Sam says I've been beyond obvious about how I feel, I'm in love with you too. You're the perfect woman". His words sink in and I throw my arms around him and kiss him utterly thrilled and silently cursing myself for being so completely oblivious. The kiss is perfect, fireworks and warmth and everything that I always thought the perfect kiss would be like. </p>
<p>Bucky grins as I break away from him and his lips meet my forehead gently as he holds me close, both of us are on cloud nine.<br/>
"I wanted to give you time after Steve to heal from that heartache doll. Then we began sharing all of those late-night talks again watching movies and just enjoying being with each other and I knew I had to tell you how I felt. Do you remember The first time we started talking? way back in Wakanda..." I nod smiling at the memory "You were so kind and so lovely to me, like sunshine. The talks with you were something I looked forward to so much and then I found out you were with Steve and it hurt but why wouldn't someone like you want to be with Steve? He's the hero, he wasn't broken like me, a mess".</p>
<p>I shake my head and cup his cheeks determined to make him see how special he is, especially to me.<br/>
''Oh Buck, you are an amazing man, so kind and sweet, you have such a beautiful heart and God you're handsome". He gives me a shy smile. "You deserve all of the happiness in the world and I'll spend every day of my life helping you see that". He smiles and we settle on the couch and he speaks again his hand stroking over my cheek.</p>
<p>"You're so beautiful, do know that?. Everything about you is beautiful to me. Honestly, sweetheart, I tried to date, I tried to move on from you but nothing ever worked. The women weren't you, you are all I want and you have no idea how happy I am that you feel the same way I do". Beaming I wrap my arms around him and say teasingly.</p>
<p>"Well, Mr Barnes, why don't you show me just exactly how happy you are". His lips meet mines in response to my request. </p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x xx</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Two years later.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So this is the end of the story and I hope you all enjoyed it 🙂 I've really enjoyed writing this story and have ideas for a few more but I need to get them outlined and the plot more developed before I post them. Thank you to everyone who left kudos and interacted with this story. It is very much appreciated 💞. Anyway, this is just the sweet and very fluffy epilogue. Enjoy 🙂</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>*Two Years Later*</p>
<p>Sunlight creeps through the windows of mine and Buckys room. It's almost eight am and I frown just wanting to stay snuggled up in bed, eager for more sleep. Smiling I move closer to Bucky and leave butterfly kisses along his jaw and neck. He opens his eyes slowly and a beautiful, beaming smile crosses his features.</p>
<p>"Hello, beautiful". He pulls me closer and just gazes at me with a dreamy, loving look that makes me melt inside. The moment is broken by a well-timed kick in my stomach from baby Barnes, I giggle and stroke my growing bump tenderly. Buckys hand moves to caress over it, pure love in his eyes as his gaze flickers between me and the bump. "How's our sweet girl today?", he asks pressing little kisses to the bump and then meeting my lips for a kiss that leaves me breathless and aching for him again. It doesn't matter how many times we make love it's like we just can't get enough of each other, I smile and answer his question.</p>
<p>"She's dancing Buck, think she's impatient to get out". He chuckles and we just lay together extremely content and eager for our sweet girl's arrival. It was a surprise finding out that I was pregnant, Bucky was absolutely thrilled and I was too, just very shocked. We have three months to go but we both just can't wait for her to arrive. </p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x. X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x </p>
<p>Our prayers are answered exactly three months and a few days later as we welcome our wonderful baby girl into the world. Becca Barnes, she's the light of my life and Buckys too. He takes to fatherhood so quickly and effortlessly and completely dotes on Becca and is even more of a loving and sweet husband than ever. The bond we have has only grown stronger and stronger and we fall more and more in love every single day. I feel so blessed and just beyond happy that life is so wonderful and that I have met the one, my person, my soulmate in Bucky and that I'm his. He catches me watching him while holding Becca and grins. "I love you, Mrs Barnes," he says softly. I beam and head over to him cooing softly at Becca before kissing him and saying it back. "I love you too Mr Barnes".</p>
<p>It's crazy to me that just a few years ago, I was so hung up on Steve and wanting to be with him, now as I look around content and beyond happy with Bucky and Becca I couldn't imagine life getting better than this.<br/>
Steve was always meant to be with Peggy and Bucky is my soulmate. We were always meant to be, he's the one, and I thank my lucky stars every day that we are together and we have our happy ending.</p>
<p>X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Please do not copy or post my work anywhere else without my permission. Thanks 💞💞</p></blockquote></div></div>
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